Nilivuka I Crossed

Nilivuka

Nimevuka mabara kuja Afrika
Lakini siku katu haikufika
            ya milima kuwa vilima
            ya mito kuwa vijito
            vya kuweza kudakiika.
Sijakufikia mpenzi
kama kwamba u nyota ya mbali
kama kwamba umemea baina yetu
            ukuta wa usingizi.
Nikikushika, mikono huwa haishiki
ila maiti ilokufa bila haki
            kama kukumbatia damu yangu jiweni
            katika nyumba iloghariki kwa tufani
            ambayo usiku wake umesimama makini
            na asubuhi yake imekwama mbali
                                                                        ikisubiri njiani.
 
Miaka imenyumbuka baina yetu: damu na moto,
Daraja nikazikwea zilogeuka ukuta
Na wewe, ukazama chini baharini
                                                            nisiweze kukugusa.
Mashaza yakanichuna, yakikata mishipa
                                                            ya mikono yangu,
Nami nikaita:
            Ewe Afrika
            mpenzi wa roho yangu,
            mwenzi wa mabuu na giza,
            Nimezunguka miaka mingi kukutafuta
            na safari yangu bado haijakatika
            ewe maiti ulojifinika kwa yako maisha.
 
Nimevuka mabara kuja Afrika
lakini siku katu haikufika
ya daraja kuweza kuvukika.
Ewe ulalaye nami kitandani
U kama nyota ya mbali mbinguni
ulo milango ilofungwa kwa ndani
Nami nimesimama nje
                                    nasubiri baridini.
 

I Crossed

I have crossed continents to reach Africa
But the day never came
          when mountains were hills
          when rivers were streams
          that could be leapt over
I have not reached you my love
You are a distant star
It's as though a wall of darkness
          has risen up between us.
When I grasp you, my hands grasp nothing
but a corpse that died with no justice
          as if I cradled a stone veined with my blood
          in a house flooded by a storm
          that stands alert through the night
          and is marooned in the morning
                                                    waiting by the road.
 
The years have stretched between us: blood and fire
the bridges I tried to cross turned into walls
and you, you have sunk to the bottom of the sea
                                                    so I couldn't touch you.
Oysters have skinned me, slicing the veins in my arms
And I call out:
                   You, Africa
                   the love of my soul
                   friend of maggots and darkness
                   I have wandered many years searching for you
                   and my journey has never stopped
                   you who have covered yourself in death your whole life
 
I have crossed continents to reach Africa
but the day never came
when those bridges could be crossed.
You who sleep by my side
are like a distant star in the sky
a door bolted from inside
And I stand outside
                           I wait in the cold.
 

This was the first of three poems by Alamin Mazrui that we translated in our workshop and it was by far the most difficult and time-consuming – no doubt because it concerns the poet’s troubling and painful relationship with Africa.

The poem is written in that very familiar tradition of addressing a country as though it were the beloved. And so Africa becomes personified as ‘a distant star’ walled up behind impenetrable darkness.

One of the most complicated lines to translate was ‘as if I embraced my blood in a stone/rock’, in Katriina’s literal – simply because it’s such a strange image. But once we came up with ‘veined’ as a way of desribing the blood in the stone, the line fell into place.

I Crossed

I have crossed continents to come to Africa
But the day never came
            that mountains became(/were) hills
            that rivers became(/were) rivulets
            which could be hopped over
I have not reached you my love
you are like a distant star
it is as if between us there has grown
            a wall of darkness.
When I grasp you, my hands do not grasp
but a corpse that died without justice
            as if I embraced my blood in a stone/rock
            in a house that was flooded by a storm
            that during the night stands attentively
            and in the morning has got stuck far away
                                                                  waiting on the road.
 
 The years between us have streched/extended: blood and fire/heat,
The bridges I climbed that turned to be walls
And you, you have sank at the bottom of the sea
                                                        so that I could not touch you.
Oysters have peeled me, cutting my veins/nerves
                                                            in the arms/hands,
And I call (out):
                        You Africa
                        the love of my soul,
                        the friend of larva/maggot and darkness,
                        I have wandered many years looking for you
                        and my journey has not yet been interrupted
                        you who covered yourself in a corpse your (whole) life.
 
I have crossed continents to come to Africa
but the day never came
that bridges could be crossed.
You who sleep with me in the bed
you (are) like a distant star in the sky
doors that are closed from inside
And I stand outside
                           I wait in the cold.
 

Original Poem by

Alamin Mazrui

Translated by

Katriina Ranne with The Poetry Translation Workshop Language

Swahili

Country

Kenya